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The Reluctant Teacher

Hey everyone... :> I know, I know.. I said that I would try to make posts more often.. and, frankly.. I tried.. I resisted... :> I am a capricorn goat... I dig in my heels at times.

There is a part of me that has its own Divine Timing, it is outside the scope of my personal wants and needs and I have trusted this part my entire life, as long as I can remember, so why am I in conflict.

Even though I am pushing forward all the time, relentlessly, preparing in great detail many workshops, weekend events, and I have written enough tangible material for a series of at least 4 or 5 books, still I hold back.

I am like a mother with her first born child holding them close, wanting them to be free, but in that moment of uncertainty wondering when my child steps into the world, and the world sees them, how will the world receive my child? Will the world be kind to my child? Will the world embrace my child or judge them, pick them apart, and break them down.

I am so reluctant to "put my child out there", because I was that child. I realize that in a bigger frame of thinking... in the Collective Soul, the information is not my child...this information is the "brain child" of Mother Nature. I am tuned in to Nature. I am the receiver, translator and broadcaster. This information is the process of how Nature thinks, creates and is in contrast to the manifestation of the physical world.

I ask myself constantly.. WHY ??? Why do I not share all of this amazing information, freely and openly, except with those closest to me, and in little bits at a time.

Effortlessly... The truth is right in front of me.

All my life, since earliest childhood... I had a friend who always spoke Truth to me... and I always listen to Her no matter what... but the world is where my friends and family are... They hear my story and say... "Oh my goodness..People are waiting for this... You need to tell people this information... People need this.... and I start to cry from my heart. I feel overwhelmed with responsibility.

As long as I can remember, I have always prayed that I do what is in the interest of the Greater Good of All, including my Self... and when my friends tell me I should be sharing this information, I feel so small and selfish.I agree and say.. "I know.. I know."

I feel ashamed that I am still with-holding like a hoarder of stuff.

I hang on, not because I don't want to share it, because I realize how valuable it is, and in the wrong hands, it would be like "throwing pearls to swines".

I am told that a Soul has to be ready to receive new ways of understanding old ways of thinking, even though the ways are not working. People know something is "wrong with the world" but they don't understand why.

The information is not new....

There's nothing new..

its about a new understanding of the information we already have.

Theories. concepts, beliefs and ideas limit us and cause us great pain if we attach our Soul and our understanding of time to them.

As Souls, we are fragments of Light. If we choose to embody a human, we are born into cultures and families with written and unwritten laws and traditions that do not Serve the Individual Soul from which we came. The human laws do not serving the Collective Soul, it is made up of Individual Souls, so it does not serve the Collective Soul either. Attachment and limits hold us. It holds In a container at the crossroad between Time and Space. .

If we allow our Self to experience what is in the Presence of our True Self, we know "what is" for certain. We know... It is not just a thought, an idea or concept.. ... it is in our physical experience...We feel it in our being-ness and it registers inside our body through our central nervous system.

When the Truth comes into the proximity of where it originated it is a feeling of "coming home" like coming home after a long trip , back to your RESIDENCE..... OM is its RESONANCE.. Home is where we live our Truth.. ..Where we relax and renew our Self. .

When you are at "home", your mind doesn't have a choice anymore. Mind has to accept this "new" way of being, or it will struggle with the OverSoul until it surrenders. This mental conflict is labelled "mental illness or mental instability". The mind has to willingly submit to actually change its resonance. Truth is energetically aligned with the Collective Soul. We cannot escape our True Self.

If the ego of mind is strongly attached to beliefs and the mind is unyielding to this unsettling experience of Life, the result can be life-threatening, if it not supported by Love and physical means...

The exposure to a physical undeniable experience of Truth is like coming into a bright Light when you've been thinking about the Light, thinking you already know what Light is but in that moment, you realize you've been in the dark "thinking and dreaming" as if you are in the Light....It is not what you expected. .. It can be painful to your ego, to your I / EYE", when you see the Light for the first time, because then you know, beyond doubt, that you were wrong.

When you lean into the Light... and go with the Light... you get it "right"and it feels right, ... you the Light.

There is nothing to be afraid of... Being consumed into that bright Light, is like coming back home... and it does not extinguish the individual Soul that you are, in fact.. it ignites the entire inner world of the Body Mind. All that was cut off through previous schisms of life experience is made "right".

The pain is a result of "wrong" thinking, backwards thinking, going against Nature.... Nature only flows in one direction... forward.. to the right... Point of reference is the the problem for many people. they dont know "where" they are in the Cosmic body of Light.

We have been purposely schooled backwards to our true nature... The Nature VS Nurture concept is huge deception to keep humanity enslaved in our minds.

The conditioning of the Collective Mind through fear and shame, and the indoctrination, of beliefs and concepts and theories, that have been taught as FACT when they are at best, science fiction.... the education and religion that restricts and sets rules that goe against Nature has built up individual ego with more fear and shame.

So what can you do about this?? BE GLAD.. the research is done...

Now its up to you to write the report.

You've been gathering research all your life, so you could put your pieces back together in a way that makes sense.

You have all the information you need... it is the understanding that makes you realize how authentic and unique you are.

It's your story.

The Teachings I bring on behalf of Nature are easily delivered through the hearts of people who are open and ready.

I know this Truth, because I have listened to this voice for my whole life, as long as I can remember and it guides me and changes me, as I am willing to be guided and changed.

I know this information belongs "out there" in the world, and that it does not belong to me. It is sacred... and not mine to keep.

I have carried this metaphorical "dragon egg" of information with me like an unborn child Elemental Nature, Fire and Water within my Soul down through the ages, thru many lives, hiding, and dying to protect this truth from corruption and deception.

I hold this information, and protect it as a Mother protects a child. I will continue to protect it until it either cracks open in my own hands or I am instructed to pass it on to the One who is waiting for it. I will not attempt to rush its arrival.

As much as I want to share everything with everyone..I have learned that you cannot put water into a cup that is already full.

So, I wait patiently, and I hold the Teachings like a Water Tower filled to the brim overflowing from time to time, but hoping for someone to turn on the tap, giving relief to the Tower and filling their own container. Water... is Life... Come to the Well!!

I share everywhere I can, when I can, and with those with the capacity to receive what I hold. I try to stay under the radar of the namecalling judge-mental meanies!! :>

Anyway.. this week, with the guidance of a friend, I was given a huge insight to a previous lesson I learned about Divine Timing...

I was reminded about the paradox of relationships and how energetically one level of a teaching contradicts the last level taught to the student. We are multidimensional in nature... many levels and planes of reality. Energetically they flip back and forth to hold together, like magnets.. each layer alternates from positive and then negative.. until you get to the center.

Ignorant, disgruntled or impatient students may question their guru's behavior, judging them harshly, as he may say... 'Do as I say, not as I do!". They "THINK" him a hypocrite and judgen his behavior. However, energetically, he is on an altogether different plane of reality and "feels" the world through the eyes of his heart.

There is a Great Truth in this teaching that cannot be taught.. only experienced!! .

While people who love me are truly being encouraging in their efforts. I hold back...I am resistant.

While I know I am ready, and I am told that I am ready, I am also told... that the world is not ready.. and so I trust this resistance.

I am told... "Wait for it... Wait for it.. Wait for that moment.... It's not yet... but it is coming very soon!! " I don't really understand..... :>

Spirit says... "Think about football"... huh??? ....I see an image in my mind's eye.. ... a crowded stadium, the roar of wild fans, a scoreboard and voice says... 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,.......

"Are you there??? Remember this...."

"A Hail Mary moment comes once in a lifetime... in a moment just before all is lost. The pass is held back, not out of hesitation or resistance, but rather so the quarterback and the rest of the team can get into position to get the ball and win the game....

So...wait for it...Don't rush it...

Time will stand still for you, as everyone else gets into position. In that precise moment, you will hear my Voice say..

"NOW". and your world changes before the ball leaves your hand.

When will it happen?? It is happening outside the limits of the human concept of Timing..

I have regained my sense of confidence that I am doing exactly what I need to be doing at the exact time I need to be doing it. Hail Mary!! :>

that's all for now... love your comments, questions or thoughts.


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